A Good Reminder

Last week I fell back into some old bad habits. I was set to go out of town for work from Saturday to Wednesday. I knew it would be difficult to stay on top of my assignments for the week, as Saturday and Wednesday are both big days for my homework. I thought I'd be able to manage it though. I was driving with my bosses, and they have wifi hotspots on both of their phones. I figured I'd be able to do homework during the four hour car ride. I forgot that I get carsick when I read for any extended amount of time. Sure enough after I'd been on my computer for less than half an hour I started to feel nauseous. Needless to say I didn't get any homework done on either of those car rides.

When we got to the hotel I immediately tried to sign into the room's internet, only to find out it was having some issues. I contacted the front desk and they sent someone out. He changed the modem and it seemed to be working fine. Unfortunately right after he finished I had to leave to meet my bosses for dinner. When I got back it was having the same problem. And here is where my old bad habits kicked in. Instead of immediately requesting a new room so that I'd be able to do my homework without issue, I kept that room for the duration of my stay. Why?

As I looked back over the week I realized that I had not been reading my scriptures and praying as I had been in the habit of since starting Pathway. And I knew right there, that's what it was. I've had lots of years to get comfortable with not really trying very hard. The Becoming Project, started last semester, and the Christlike Attributes project from this semester, have both been instrumental in so much of the growth I've experienced over the last few months. With these projects and class assignments has come the required studying and pondering of the words of prophets of God, and even from the Savior himself, Jesus Christ. In order to do well in my classes I've had to put aside what I want to do, what I want to say, and how I want to react, and instead "try a little harder to be a little better."

To bolster my efforts in these areas I've had the daily ingesting of words of peace and wisdom, encouragement to keep the commandments and be more like the Savior.  I've had daily interaction with the Spirit as I've read, listened, and pondered the words found in the scriptures. I've prayed for strength to be more humble and to have a desire to be better. But I relaxed and got careless. And it showed. So this week's blog post is not so much about what I learned from a topic, but what I learned from not following through on the commitments I've made to study and pray.

I learned that I am just a woman, who on her own doesn't do all that great. I learned that I am so much better when I have the daily influence of the Holy Ghost to guide my thoughts, words and actions. I learned that there is a definite purpose to the assignments we receive every week, and that it is for our own good we're asked to do them. I learned that I am much happier and have more peace when I am reading or hearing often the sacred words found in the scriptures. I learned that I definitely want to be the person I am capable of becoming if I stay close to the Spirit by searching those books and praying to receive revelation and improve my relationship with my Heavenly Father.

Charity, The Pure Love of Christ

The scriptures teach that charity is the pure love of Christ. But what does that mean? What does the pure love of Christ look like?

Mormon wrote, “Charity suffereth long, and is kind, and envieth not, and is not puffed up, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil, and rejoiceth not in iniquity but rejoiceth in the truth, beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.” (Moroni 7:45)

Charity is the attribute of Christ I have chosen to work on for the last couple of weeks. I've noticed an increase in patience, forgiveness, being able to put myself in other's positions, and my desire to be more like Christ, as I have tried to center my life around this attribute of his. I've not been perfect, by any means. But that's not the point, is it? Christ routinely showed charity towards others by healing them, offering them forgiveness, teaching them how they could have eternal life, and, ultimately, sacrificing his own life to perform the atonement. If we look at the kind of life he led we can imagine how we would be if we lived a life of perfect charity.

In the most recent session of conference, President Thomas S. Monson spoke about six attributes of Christ he felt were important for us to have in order for us to be an example of the Savior and a light in the world. He felt this topic was so important that he gave finished his talk, even though it was clear he was struggling to even stay standing. He said, "I am confident there are within our sphere of influence those who are lonely, those who are ill, and those who feel discouraged. Ours is the opportunity to help them and to lift their spirits. The Savior brought hope to the hopeless and strength to the weak." And in the October 2003 General Conference, then Relief Society President said concerning charity, "Charity is our love for the Lord, shown through our acts of service, patience, compassion, and understanding for one another."

There's a lot of talk today about laws that need to be enacted. Gun laws, immigration laws to try and prevent terrorism, etc. One thing you'll never hear politicians say is that if we just showed the pure love of Christ towards each other, these laws wouldn't be necessary. Knowing Christ's desire for us to show charity to one another, I have a responsibility to exhibit it to everyone I meet, no matter how difficult the circumstances. The world can be changed just one small act at a time. As the saying goes, out of small things shall great things come to pass. Hearts can be healed, wounds bound up, whole lives set on a different course. It's something worth striving for.

Behold, Thou Art Nephi, and I Am God.

I had a rough week. I didn't get much sleep, I worked every day, and I had a lot of homework. I also had to make a pretty big decision about my house and where I thought I'd be in the next little while. I felt anxious, and uncertain that I could even make the right decision. My friend had told me to pray for a miracle, but what miracle was I supposed to pray for? I didn't know.

As I was driving to work Friday morning I felt pretty despondent.  I had been assigned to write a letter over the weekend and hadn't done it right. I had gone to bed only about four hours before, staying up till the week small hours of the morning rewriting it.  As I drove I began to feel overwhelmed with fear that I still hadn't done it right, that the person who had asked for it would be disappointed, that I'd have to rewrite it yet again, and that it wouldn't even make a difference anyway.

As I started to give into those feelings I felt that I should listen to my scriptures on my phone. I plugged in the auxiliary cord and pressed play. It had left off on Helaman, chapter 10. Then the narrator got to verse 6, and I started to cry.

"Behold, thou art Nephi, and I am God."

Right then, I knew I, too, was known. God knows each of us intimately. He is aware of our struggles, and waits to support us in them. I'm really grateful for a loving Father who allows us to go through situations that, although painful, will help us to grow and become the people who can live with Him eternally. And I'm especially grateful that through those situations, if we will remember that He is aware, he will give us the strength to get through them.